Three appointments & finally something to celebrate

Today we had a bunch of appointments related to Sean. Our first appointment of the day was yet another fetal echo.

Sean cooperated very nicely for the echo and the tech was able to get way more pics than ever before. There has been no change in his heart. His pulmonary artery should be about 8mm-9mm wide and his is narrowed to about 7mm. So it's not to bad. She did say though that these are approximations because you can't ever really get a true picture until the baby is out. His blood flow in his brain is good & the umbilical cord looks good. 

The cardiologist said that Sean would be able to be released from the nicu and into the regular nursery after the first night if he was doing well. And then he would be discharged from the hospital with me. 

Then we met with the neonatologist. I didn't necessarily care for this guy, but he's the director of the unit. So it's not a guarantee I'll even have to see him. He said that Sean will come to me first as long as he's crying and breathing & then goto the nicu team. He will be evaluated and given IV fluids if his sugars dip below 45. They encourage bfing, but warned that because of the down's, Sean's muscle tone may not be strong enough to suck well. He would then be kept in the nicu until he was able to suck. If my milk is not enough, then we will have to supplement until my milk comes in. This bothers me, but it is what it is I guess. I wondered what would happen if we didn't know he had down's until he was born. This wouldn't even be an issue. At least I don't think it would be. They'd wait until my milk came in and that would be it. Why can't we assume that my body is making enough? Especially since the amount you can pump is never indicative of the amount of milk a baby can suckle from a breast. A baby is usually more efficient. I wonder what the lactation nazi's at the hospital would say about that. I'm not opposed to formula feeding and I'm not opposed to supplementing with formula. I'm annoyed that they don't seem willing to allow breastfeeding to happen naturally on it's own course. It takes time for any mother & baby to develop a good nursing relationship. 


I guess I should be grateful for what I am getting. A trained nicu staff that will be there if Sean has a problem. I also get to deliver at the hospital my OB is affiliated with. 


I am allowed to the nicu anytime I want to hold him, feed him, etc. So will Rob. No one else will be allowed to visit him while he's there. He also said that Sean will be discharged from the hosp from the nicu. Not into a regular nursery & then home. He said that if his sucking is great and the cardiologist releases him, he could go home with me or a day later. 

Then it was time for the non-stress test & ultrasound. Sean did very well this time with the NST. His heart rate stayed around 130+ beats per minutes. Then the good u/s tech did my u/s. Everything measured right on time and his femur was proportional and of normal length. Then we switched to 3/d. When she swiped across his face I screamed "Oh my god he looks normal!" She asked why he wouldn't so we told her that he had downs. Even though she was there for the amnio, she hadn't followed up on the results. She spent a lot of time looking for any markers for down's. He has a fully formed nasal bone, all the bones in his fingers & his femur is of normal length. She looked and looked and looked at his face & everything and said that it was amazing that he had down's. 


We went into this expecting someone very different to be staring back at us. We expected very different features. We expected very different emotions when we finally saw a face staring back at us. I guess I was expecting to feel saddened that he didn't look like a "normal" or typical baby. I wasn't expecting to see this typical looking baby staring back at me. I wasn't expecting to be elated when I saw his little face.  He looks normal to me. He has my nose and Meredith's lips. He weighs about 5.5lbs. 

Not that I would feel differently about him if he has characteristics of down's and not that I think this is the end all of pictures, but it was nice to have something to celebrate finally. I told Rob that if Sean comes out & doesn't have the 1 crease on his palm, we're having him retested.